It's been a year. For some that's a long time. I don't know where the time went. I've been writing. I haven't been writing. I've been travelling. I haven't been travelling. I have definitely been rambling.

What happens in our lives? What we achieve and what we fail at? It's all on us. I knew this. I didn't want to believe it. If you believe such things than you know that you're the one to blame. It's hard to come to terms with that.

Dream big. Dreams are free. The onus is on you whether they become a reality.

It's time to get back into the swing of things. Keep on writing.

November

How you spend the 1^st of November will depend on which country you reside in at the time. In Poland for example, people will spend today visiting their loved ones graves, lighting candles, leaving flowers and ornaments, and praying. The annual event is one for remembrance and while at times it certainly feels like a sad day, it’s actually about celebrating and remembering the loved ones that have moved on while spending time with the loved ones still with us.

If you’re in Australia today, you’re probably going to be punting on the Melbourne Cup and hoping the horse you picked comes first. Melbourne Cup falls on the first Tuesday of November each year, this year it happened to be the first, so let’s hope it’s a winning start to all for November or Movember as some might call it.

Then again you might be having your final shave to get ready for the month of Movember. An annual event that helps raise money for men’s health issues.

Or you may be starting that novel you've always wanted to write for National Novel Writing Month. 50,000 words in 30 days. Doable, certainly. Fun, you betcha. Challenging, definitely. Worth it, hell yeah!

Whatever you do today, have a great one!

Getting Pampered

Last week I received a lovely gift from one of my good friends – a 2 hour pampering package at a beauty salon which included an aromatherapy massage, facial, foot mask and scalp massage. I used the voucher today.

The lady guides me into a small room with dark walls, music plays in the background and I notice the small CD player on the floor. She instructs me to undress and lie on the table on my front with the towel covering my bottom half. I look around after she leaves and notice the lovely red flowers on the towels. I undress, gently remove the flowers and lie down as instructed. I’m anxious, I can feel my muscles are tensing up and I’m wondering whether I will feel better after. The music is soothing, Balinese tunes, birds chirping. The massage table creaks as I position myself comfortably on it. I wait.

I have a strong distaste for waiting or being still. Patience is something I’m learning. Relaxation is another thing I need to master. I’m here to unwind, clear my mind and rejuvenate but as I lie there my mind begins to go to overdrive. The women returns and begins the aromatherapy massage starting with my back. It’s light but still eases my aching muscles from the previous day’s weight training.

For a moment I manage to focus on my breathing and the massage itself. My neck is still tense. I force myself to relax and let go of some of that tension. The scalp massage surprises me. It hurts and that’s my fault – I don’t speak up. It hurts but after it’s over my head feels strangely relaxed. Before I know it, the hour massage is over and I have some sort of foot mask covering my feet and two towels dropped over them.

The facial is next. My face gets washed, scrubbed and wiped. She informs me she’s putting on a collagen cream that will keep my face young – not sure I believe it but hey, it’s worth a try. The avocado mask follows; then she puts two wet things on my eyes and leaves the room. I can’t stand this part. My mind starts to wander again. Even the music isn’t helping. I can’t just sit still and just be. That’s not me. I know I need to relax so I focus on my breathing. I get jittery, I tap my fingers, I stop, I tap again and realise that I am hopeless at this. I feel like I’m lying there for at least half an hour but it’s more like ten minutes before she returns and clears the gunk off my face. ‘We’re finished, thank you,’ she says.

I get up and get dressed. My body does feel relaxed even though I couldn’t settle my mind. Maybe after a few more days of getting massages and facials even my mind might shut off for an hour or two; or maybe not. Either way, it was lovely to get pampered.  

Tough times

My blood boils when I read stories about people who break the law and are labelled as ‘having no respect for parents or police’. Can we really be surprised by this? Especially, when discipline has been eradicated from the family home and in its place we have been given stress-free upbringing.

Youth no longer have any respect for older people or authority. If the police fail to hold any authority over youth it’s difficult to imagine that parents are going to do a better job. It seems that adolescents, teenagers and young adults are leading the way into creating a dangerous society that is based on crime, violence and rage. I don’t want to live in that society, do you?

I don’t think our governments thought through their decision to ban smacking and disciplining children in a physical way. While I strongly disagree to beating someone to a pulp, I don’t see a problem with a smack on the butt for doing something wrong. I strongly disagree with the studies conducted about smacking causing psychological problems. In most cases parents should avoid physical discipline but sometimes that’s the only thing that will leave an impact.

My parents rarely smacked me though I do recall a couple occasions where I got smacked. I deserved it. None of them caused any permanent or temporary damage. I didn’t repeat the things I did again. Today, I understand why I got smacked and there are days when I wish that my parents got out the wooden spoon a little bit more often. Maybe I would have avoided a few of the issues I went through.

The riots taking place in London at the moment are the result of youngsters who have not been taught discipline or respect for society and for themselves. It’s easy to blame unemployment or an incompetent government (partially they are responsible), but it mostly comes down to how a person is brought up. Looking at the situation there are many more people excluding themselves from the riots and it’s only the small percentage that are creating a terrible reputation for themselves and society.

People require guidance, they require respect and discipline. This guidance, respect and discipline should begin at a young age. When it does, it’s clear to see that society functions in a peaceful manner. There will always be a black sheep in the crowd, but the majority will maintain a certain level of self discipline to act accordingly. Guidance from the community is also necessary.

Times are tough. I understand that. Jobs are hard to come by; the cost of education is on the rise; and, community support at times seems lacking. But generations before us had it much worse. They lived through world wars, the depression and a society without many of the comforts we are blessed (or cursed) with today.

Taking a step back and looking at society from a window view makes you realise that we make our own choices. Some people are more or less disadvantaged than others. There are families who face hardships every day and those who bathe in Crystal champagne; people live off bread and water, while others dine on fillet mignon and lobster. The material things separate them but when we get down to basics they are one and the same.

I’ve read stories about severely disadvantaged individuals persevering and achieving amazing success. I’ve also seen many wealthy and privileged men and women lose it all because of their stupidity. Happiness is a state of mind. We choose to be happy. We choose to have respect. We choose to have self-discipline. Sometimes the road will have rough spots but getting through it will only make us stronger if we allow it to. These are tough times but as a community we can get through them.

5 Ways Not To Get Published

1*Play Solitaire for hours and try to beat your highest winning streak but fail miserably. Placing cards in the correct order in the correct colour on your computer is not going to get the research done or story written. Bye-bye to any publishing success, unless of course you’re writing a story about Solitaire.

2*Write down lots of ideas for articles every day but never actually come up with a slant, do the research or write a query letter to a suitable publication. Writers often get asked, ‘where do you get your ideas from?’ If you’re coming up with those riveting story ideas and doing nothing about them then you are not going to get published. They’re no use to anyone hidden away in your computer files somewhere.

3*Talk about wanting to write but never actually get around to putting even a sentence down on to paper or computer. Talking is not the same as writing. It’s not going to put words together that editors’ love. The only way to do that is to actually plant butt in chair and start typing or scribbling away.

4*Forget about revising, editing and going through grammar and spelling with a fine-tooth comb. Whether you’ve just finished writing a story, novel, article or poem, it’s not finished yet. The hard work comes next; every sentence has to be in the right order. Every paragraph has to have a purpose. Confusing ‘there’ with ‘their’ or ‘effect’ with ‘affect’ is not acceptable nor is ‘except’ with ‘accept’, and it happens more often than some like to admit.

5*Don’t try to improve your writing by meddling in different genres, trying new techniques, using advice from others, and reading voraciously. Writers write, they also read, seek quality advice, constantly try to improve their writing skills, pick up new vocabulary and work on becoming the best that they can be. Writing is a business, it’s also a competitive business and if you want to stay in business you have to constantly keep on top of your game.

Now for a little confession: I’m guilty of all three. I spend way too much time playing Solitaire, I come up with ideas for articles and novels on a daily basis but rarely do much with them, I often tell my partner how much I need to write but when it actually comes to getting down and writing I’ve been slacking off over the past few months- I’m blaming it on acclimatising to being back on the Gold Coast. Then there’s the part about writing but rarely getting to the editing stage – it can be so boring; or forgetting about learning new vocabulary and trying to improve on my writing skills. Yep, me, I’m guilty as charged and now I have to make reprimands and get back on track so that I can be productive once again.

Surfers Paradise

你们好

I survived the first online lecture. At first I was terrified. I didn’t know what to expect. This is Chinese. A complete different language from English. A language that everyone always told me was really difficult to learn. Sure it doesn’t look easy, but I’ve never been one to take the easy route. So here I am, glad that I finally took the plunge to start learning a completely foreign language to me.

The first thing I worried about is being unable to write using Chinese characters. Luckily my computer was kind enough not to make things complicated. With one obstacle out of the way things were looking good.

The class required a camera and headphones with a microphone. I had just purchased a new lap top bag that came with all that. One less thing to worry about.

Logging on to the online lecture I felt a little bit intimidated, frightened, concerned about how it was all going to look like. Thankfully, the lecturer was friendly and helpful throughout and made the two hour lecture enjoyable. It was nice to see the faces of all the people I will be learning with over the next three months. Ah, technology what would we do without you.

One thing I am certain of is that learning Chinese is going to take a lot of effort. I like the fact that there are no tenses to learn and that the words are monosyllable, and most of the punctuation is the same. What does worry me a little bit are the tones. Getting a tone wrong can change the meaning of what you say. Hopefully, with practice even the tones will become simple. Fingers crossed.

您好！ 我叫Katarzyna.